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4/20

About a third of my Facebook feed today is filled with #420 memes and statuses and another third is filled with people who are annoyed by people who are into weed.

For most of my life, I was in the latter group. Most stoners I knew growing up were trashy white boys who listened to Sublime, made jokes about Funyuns, and mocked me for being a straight A student. In my younger brain, I thought pretty much all stoners were lazy, and probably also smelled like skunk. However, after cannabis was legalized in Oregon, it was suggested I use some for my chronic pain, mood disorder, and nausea. So, I tried some. Sure enough, it made me feel a whole lot better.

I had been taking pills for pain, which sometimes made me feel like a zombie (and made my nausea worse). I used to drink booze multiple times a week to help with anxiety, but I’d feel terrible later, and it honestly made me way moodier overall. Discovering the healing that cannabis could offer me, and realizing I had no negative side effects the next day and I didn’t even have to smoke if I didn’t want to (hooray for edibles and oil!) was actually life-changing.

I also discovered other types of weed lovers too — high femmes, successful stoners, chronic pain warriors, cancer survivors, and everyday people who used it to help themselves feel better about their bodies, sex, stress, etc. Yes, there are still plenty of smelly slacker stoners out there, but I’ve grown to appreciate cannabis culture. I love that anywhere I go where people are smoking weed, they’ll invite me into their circle and share both their cannabis and their stories freely.

I love that when I’m high I am in love with myself and my brain and my body (which, when I am sober, I struggle to appreciate). I love that cannabis has helped me work through trauma without shutting down, helped me make new friends easily, and truly helped my career by allowing me to have less pain and anxiety so I can accomplish more. It’s also made me hear songs in brand new ways, taste foods more intensely, and helped me process two back to back heartbreaks that surely would have crushed me a few years ago.

So, yes, I recognize that this “holiday” is completely goofy and maybe even obnoxious to a bunch of folks. But for lots of us, it is a day to celebrate that we have a plant that helps us more easily handle all the bullshit life can throw our way. For me, I use cannabis not as a way to escape, but as a way to become more connected — to myself and to others. I use it to let my overactive and frequently worried mind have some moments of solace. I use it to zone in on relaxing and relieving parts of my body that are chronically tense or in pain. I use it as a social lubricant, a libido booster, and a creativity booster.

I am outraged that so many people, most especially POC, have been sent to prison (or worse) for buying, selling, or possessing weed. I am sad that cannabis is still not legal in many places where I know it would help many members of the population. I’m frustrated by restrictive laws and ridiculous punishments. I know I am lucky to live in Oregon and be able to travel easily to Washington, so that I can enjoy cannabis legally and safely. I wish and hope that one day everyone will have access if they need it. Until then, I’ll keep being a vocal and passionate supporter of cannabis rights, decriminalization, and reparations for communities that have been disproportionately affected by America’s War on Drugs.

To all who celebrate – whether you celebrate sincerely, humorously, with a heavy heart/conscious mind, or every damn day – Happy 420!

Adventure, BDSM, Culture, Dating, feminist, Feminist Porn, Femmes, Fisting, guest blog, Intern, Intern Courtney, Kink, Mental Health, Personal Blog, Podcast, Polyamory, pop culture, Porn, queer femmes, Queer Porn, Queer Sex, queer sex, real life poly, Relationships, self-discovery, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Toys, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Spanking, Storytelling, Strap on Sex

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Community, Care, and a Femme Sex Coven

Read this heartwarming, sexy, sweet little personal essay written by our very own magical intern (Intern Courtney) for Autostraddle! It’s about her experiences with our Femme Sex Coven (also featured in Episode 9 of our podcast, Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane)!

This made me cry happy tears. So much love for my intern and friend, Courtney, for my community, and for all of the witchy wonderful femmes out there! <3

 

Cougars, Culture, Dating, feminist, Intergenerational Relationships, Intersectional Polyamory, Life Changes, Podcast, Polyamory, pop culture, Porn, real life poly, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 10: Intergenerational Relationships & Cougars

Episode 10: Intergenerational Relationships (& “Cougars”) Our tenth episode is on the topic of intergenerational romantic relationships – or significant age differences between partners – and the unique considerations, benefits, and issues that tend to come up in these relationships. We’ll hear from The Date Maven, Suzanna Mathews, author of Revising Mrs. Robinson – a book that dives into ageism, sexism, and the “cougar taboo.” We’ll also hear from sex and disability educator and advocate Robin Wilson-Beattie about the intersections of age, race, and disability when dating polyamorously.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Revising Mrs. Robinson

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! Promo code: SOTB4

She Bop’s upcoming classes

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests – Suzanna Mathews and Robin Wilson-Beattie

 

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!

Anxiety, Culture, Depression, feminist, Life Changes, Medical Marijuana, Mental Health, Podcast, Politics, Relationships, Self-Care, self-love, Sex, Sex & Depression, Sex Education, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 8: Sex & Self-Care

Episode 8: Sex & Self-Care is a collaboration with Ev’Yan Whitney, host of The Sexually Liberated Woman podcast.  In this episode, Amory Jane and Ev’Yan chat about how their sex lives and intimate relationships have been impacted since the election and share their thoughts on self-care, sexual expression, body love, and resistance. They also take a live call from writer and “professional oversharer” Crista Anne. Trigger Warning: Trump, mentions of sexual abuse, discussions about trauma, mental health, and survival.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode/helpful links:

News Feed Eradicator for Facebook

NPR: In Trying Times, A Mental Health Professional Advocates for Self-Care

Bitch Media Article: Audre Lorde thought of Self-Care as an “Act of Political Warfare”

Everyday Feminism Article: 5 Self-Care Tips for Activists

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here!

Credits

Host — Amory Jane

Co-Host/Guest — Ev’Yan Whitney

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song — Mat Vuksinich

Caller – Crista Anne

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube

Anxiety, Cannabis, Culture, Depression, Medical Marijuana, Mental Health, Podcast, pop culture, Sex, Sex & Depression, Sex and Cannabis, Sex Education, Sex on the Brain, sexuality, Stigma, Uncategorized

Amory Jane on Mary Jane: Cannabis & My Body

After a year of research entitled “Amory Jane on Mary Jane: Cannabis & My Body” I have found that cannabis has helped me with/relieved:
-Nausea
-Muscular pain (still chronic, but helps me manage the pain and also relax enough for healing to take place)
-Spasms
-Anxiety (although some strains can make it worse in certain situations).
-Menstrual Cramps (seriously the best remedy I’ve ever found)
-TMJ/TMD
-Depression (still dealing with it as regularly as ever, but Sky cannabis oil can help me get through really dark times and spiraling moments without letting them destroy me for weeks on end)
-Sex: body image, less pain in hips and other frequently achey spots, feeling more connected to my body, giving oral sex is extra fun while high, libido boost, cool different orgasms.

It has not helped with:
-Being a long-term “cure” for depression
-Fertility
-Short-term memory
-Self-Discipline
-Sinus problems

My most frequent and favorite way of consuming cannabis is through ingesting cannabis oil (a couple drops under the tongue, then swallow, then wait a while for it to kick in). My #1 recommended products are from Luminous Botanicals (and I promise they’re not paying me to say that! I just think their stuff is incredible). I like edibles/tonics/tinctures because I have asthma and smoking is not great for my lungs. However, sometimes I want to sit around and share a bong with friends, so I do smoke occasionally. I also have an herb vaporizer pen for getting high (or just relaxing with some CBD weed) on the go. It’s nice to have options and I am grateful that I live in a state with legal cannabis, especially since I don’t have health insurance.

Not everyone reacts the same way, but after a year of journaling, those are my own personal (summarized) findings. Feel free to share yours as well, and for more info on sex and cannabis, check out Episode 4 of my podcast, of Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane!

Anxiety, Bipolar, Culture, Depression, Kink, Life Changes, Mental Health, Podcast, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex & Depression, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Toys, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Shame, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 7: Sex & Depression

This week’s guest – JoEllen Notte (The Redhead Bedhead) – describes sex and depression as “the intersection of two taboo topics.” Good thing Amory Jane and Intern Courtney have no problems discussing taboos! Instead, they open up and share firsthand accounts of living with mental illness and how kink and sex toys have helped them retain their sex lives during depressive episodes. On the second half of the show, JoEllen Notte dives into her research on depression and how mental illness and medication can impact our sex lives and our relationships. She also debunks depression myths, offers important advice for partners of people living with depression, and emphasizes how none of us are broken.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Whoopee! – Get tickets here! – Promo Code: SEXBRAIN

JoEllen’s articles on Sex & Depression

Depression Quest

Ring Theory

Spoon Theory

Classes at She Bop

Credits

Host — Amory Jane

Intern/Guest — Courtney Kist

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song — Mat Vuksinich

Guest – JoEllen Notte

 

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube