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4/20

About a third of my Facebook feed today is filled with #420 memes and statuses and another third is filled with people who are annoyed by people who are into weed.

For most of my life, I was in the latter group. Most stoners I knew growing up were trashy white boys who listened to Sublime, made jokes about Funyuns, and mocked me for being a straight A student. In my younger brain, I thought pretty much all stoners were lazy, and probably also smelled like skunk. However, after cannabis was legalized in Oregon, it was suggested I use some for my chronic pain, mood disorder, and nausea. So, I tried some. Sure enough, it made me feel a whole lot better.

I had been taking pills for pain, which sometimes made me feel like a zombie (and made my nausea worse). I used to drink booze multiple times a week to help with anxiety, but I’d feel terrible later, and it honestly made me way moodier overall. Discovering the healing that cannabis could offer me, and realizing I had no negative side effects the next day and I didn’t even have to smoke if I didn’t want to (hooray for edibles and oil!) was actually life-changing.

I also discovered other types of weed lovers too — high femmes, successful stoners, chronic pain warriors, cancer survivors, and everyday people who used it to help themselves feel better about their bodies, sex, stress, etc. Yes, there are still plenty of smelly slacker stoners out there, but I’ve grown to appreciate cannabis culture. I love that anywhere I go where people are smoking weed, they’ll invite me into their circle and share both their cannabis and their stories freely.

I love that when I’m high I am in love with myself and my brain and my body (which, when I am sober, I struggle to appreciate). I love that cannabis has helped me work through trauma without shutting down, helped me make new friends easily, and truly helped my career by allowing me to have less pain and anxiety so I can accomplish more. It’s also made me hear songs in brand new ways, taste foods more intensely, and helped me process two back to back heartbreaks that surely would have crushed me a few years ago.

So, yes, I recognize that this “holiday” is completely goofy and maybe even obnoxious to a bunch of folks. But for lots of us, it is a day to celebrate that we have a plant that helps us more easily handle all the bullshit life can throw our way. For me, I use cannabis not as a way to escape, but as a way to become more connected — to myself and to others. I use it to let my overactive and frequently worried mind have some moments of solace. I use it to zone in on relaxing and relieving parts of my body that are chronically tense or in pain. I use it as a social lubricant, a libido booster, and a creativity booster.

I am outraged that so many people, most especially POC, have been sent to prison (or worse) for buying, selling, or possessing weed. I am sad that cannabis is still not legal in many places where I know it would help many members of the population. I’m frustrated by restrictive laws and ridiculous punishments. I know I am lucky to live in Oregon and be able to travel easily to Washington, so that I can enjoy cannabis legally and safely. I wish and hope that one day everyone will have access if they need it. Until then, I’ll keep being a vocal and passionate supporter of cannabis rights, decriminalization, and reparations for communities that have been disproportionately affected by America’s War on Drugs.

To all who celebrate – whether you celebrate sincerely, humorously, with a heavy heart/conscious mind, or every damn day – Happy 420!

Adventure, BDSM, Culture, Dating, feminist, Feminist Porn, Femmes, Fisting, guest blog, Intern, Intern Courtney, Kink, Mental Health, Personal Blog, Podcast, Polyamory, pop culture, Porn, queer femmes, Queer Porn, Queer Sex, queer sex, real life poly, Relationships, self-discovery, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Toys, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Spanking, Storytelling, Strap on Sex

Want more Femme Sex Party?

Community, Care, and a Femme Sex Coven

Read this heartwarming, sexy, sweet little personal essay written by our very own magical intern (Intern Courtney) for Autostraddle! It’s about her experiences with our Femme Sex Coven (also featured in Episode 9 of our podcast, Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane)!

This made me cry happy tears. So much love for my intern and friend, Courtney, for my community, and for all of the witchy wonderful femmes out there! <3

 

anal sex, Culture, Dating, DIY, feminist, Feminist Porn, Kink, Life Changes, Podcast, Polyamory, Porn, Queer Porn, Queer Sex, queer sex, real life poly, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Toys, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Strap on Sex, Trans porn, trans sex, transgender, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 11: Trans Sex & Sexuality

Episode 11: Trans Sex and Sexuality features a very educational interview with Brettley Mason about sex toys, being non-binary, navigating dysphoria, and safer sex for trans folks. Our 11th episode also includes a lively and personal conversation with Aurora and Intern Courtney about porn, sex work, butts, and being pro-slut.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Magic Wand

Binders from gc2b

Gender Expression items from She Bop

Two-Spirit

Buck-off Stroker

Queer and Trans Porn

Queer Porn TV

Crash Pad Series

She Bop’s upcoming classes

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! Promo code: SOTB4

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Intern/Co-Host – Courtney Kist

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests –Aurora and Brettley

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!

Cougars, Culture, Dating, feminist, Intergenerational Relationships, Intersectional Polyamory, Life Changes, Podcast, Polyamory, pop culture, Porn, real life poly, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 10: Intergenerational Relationships & Cougars

Episode 10: Intergenerational Relationships (& “Cougars”) Our tenth episode is on the topic of intergenerational romantic relationships – or significant age differences between partners – and the unique considerations, benefits, and issues that tend to come up in these relationships. We’ll hear from The Date Maven, Suzanna Mathews, author of Revising Mrs. Robinson – a book that dives into ageism, sexism, and the “cougar taboo.” We’ll also hear from sex and disability educator and advocate Robin Wilson-Beattie about the intersections of age, race, and disability when dating polyamorously.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Revising Mrs. Robinson

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! Promo code: SOTB4

She Bop’s upcoming classes

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests – Suzanna Mathews and Robin Wilson-Beattie

 

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!

Anxiety, Culture, Depression, feminist, Life Changes, Medical Marijuana, Mental Health, Podcast, Politics, Relationships, Self-Care, self-love, Sex, Sex & Depression, Sex Education, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 8: Sex & Self-Care

Episode 8: Sex & Self-Care is a collaboration with Ev’Yan Whitney, host of The Sexually Liberated Woman podcast.  In this episode, Amory Jane and Ev’Yan chat about how their sex lives and intimate relationships have been impacted since the election and share their thoughts on self-care, sexual expression, body love, and resistance. They also take a live call from writer and “professional oversharer” Crista Anne. Trigger Warning: Trump, mentions of sexual abuse, discussions about trauma, mental health, and survival.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode/helpful links:

News Feed Eradicator for Facebook

NPR: In Trying Times, A Mental Health Professional Advocates for Self-Care

Bitch Media Article: Audre Lorde thought of Self-Care as an “Act of Political Warfare”

Everyday Feminism Article: 5 Self-Care Tips for Activists

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here!

Credits

Host — Amory Jane

Co-Host/Guest — Ev’Yan Whitney

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song — Mat Vuksinich

Caller – Crista Anne

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube

Anxiety, Bipolar, Culture, Depression, Kink, Life Changes, Mental Health, Podcast, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex & Depression, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Toys, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Shame, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 7: Sex & Depression

This week’s guest – JoEllen Notte (The Redhead Bedhead) – describes sex and depression as “the intersection of two taboo topics.” Good thing Amory Jane and Intern Courtney have no problems discussing taboos! Instead, they open up and share firsthand accounts of living with mental illness and how kink and sex toys have helped them retain their sex lives during depressive episodes. On the second half of the show, JoEllen Notte dives into her research on depression and how mental illness and medication can impact our sex lives and our relationships. She also debunks depression myths, offers important advice for partners of people living with depression, and emphasizes how none of us are broken.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Whoopee! – Get tickets here! – Promo Code: SEXBRAIN

JoEllen’s articles on Sex & Depression

Depression Quest

Ring Theory

Spoon Theory

Classes at She Bop

Credits

Host — Amory Jane

Intern/Guest — Courtney Kist

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song — Mat Vuksinich

Guest – JoEllen Notte

 

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube

Comedy, feminist, Podcast, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Toys, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Uncategorized

Sex on the Brain Episode 5: Sex Toy Bonanza!

The Sex Toy Bonanza episode of Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane is finally here! In this extra special (and hilarious) 90 minute episode, sex toy experts EpiphoraDirty Lola, and Amory Jane drink mimosas and go through Epiphora’s bag of unique sex toys. They also swap stories, offer shopping ideas for the holidays, talk about sex toy classics (like the Njoy Pure Wand and Magic Wand) and definitely don’t hold back on which sex toys (and companies) leave something to be desired.

Episode 5 is chock full of snark and silliness and is a fun listen for sex toy connoisseurs, retailers, and reviewers, as well as those who just want the inside scoop on the wide and often weird world of sex toys!

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

 

Things mentioned in this episode:

Down Under ToysKola Kiss and Dual Density Silicone Dildos

SelfDelveCorn on the Cob

WeVibe Rave – Purchase this at She Bop by clicking on my affiliate link! ——>

Womanizer & Womanizer Deluxe/Pro Purchase this at She Bop by clicking on my affiliate link! ——>

Prism V

Doxy Don

Ass Cram Cone

Baddie Winkle

Amory Jane’s upcoming classes

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests – Dirty Lola and Epiphora

Additional music by Bensound (http://www.bensound.com)

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube

Cannabis, Podcast, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Storytelling, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 4: Sex & Cannabis

Episode 4: Sex & Cannabis has arrived! Get comfy, light a joint/pack a bowl, and listen to the smooth sounds of Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane.

Or, you know, pop in some headphones and listen from work. It’s available here or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher.

Amory Jane reveals her true feelings about Mary Jane and shares some of her sexy dorky very honest cannabis experiences with the show’s guests. She interviews Devan Anthony from Luminous Botanicals about running a cannabis business, getting high, the healing powers of CBD, and cannabis for sensual use. On the second half of the show, Ashley Manta smashes stoner stereotypes and talks about cannasexuality and how she came to be The Cannasexual. Plus, Amory Jane and Ashley geek out on hand jobs, terpenes, and cannabis lubricant.

Other things mentioned in this episode:

Whoopee! A Sex Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! – Promo Code: SEXBRAIN

Amory Jane’s upcoming classes

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Intern – Courtney Kist

Guests – Devan Anthony and Ashley Manta

Additional music by Bensound (http://www.bensound.com)

Many thanks this episode’s sponsors- She BopUberlube, and Luminous Botanicals!

Adventure, Career, guest blog, Intern, Kink, Life Changes, Renovation, Roadtrip, self-discovery, self-love, Sex, Sex Ed Mobile, Sex Ed Teaching Tour, Sex Education, Sex Educator, sexuality, Teaching Tour, Travel, Travel Blog, Uncategorized

While the boss is away…

Hello Readers! It’s your favorite weirdo intern, Intern Courtney!

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Look at this witchy needle goddess!

Amory Jane is currently at a kink retreat called Boundless and will be returning to Portland (and this blog) on October 5th. Since she is off learning new things to teach at her future classes, getting to know some needles, gazing at the stars, and frolicking/flogging in the woods, she hasn’t had reliable access to the internet to post any updates. So, I am here to deliver some deets to you! Here’s what’s up:

St. Edna the Sex Ed Mobile is very sick. Amory Jane and her travel companions were driving back into Portland when Edna started making very weird noises. Her engine died suddenly on the side of the highway just 20 minutes outside of Portland and she had to get towed away by AAA. Fortunately, the team made it back to Portland and Edna didn’t shut down on top of a mountain or in the middle of the desert or something. Unfortunately, Edna has complete engine failure and will need some expensive repairs. AJ is still weighing all of her options, but is considering launching a campaign and/or throwing a sex-positive fundraising event to get Edna back out on the road. In the meantime, AJ is traveling the country in a much smaller (but equally cute) sex ed mobile – her purple Honda Fit.

– Amory Jane has some rad classes coming up this Fall, including a new one on Sex and Cannabis! There might even be some free cannabis lube samples in it for you! Details can be found on the She Bop website.

screen-shot-2016-10-03-at-11-45-48-pm– Amory Jane will be traveling through California this November and still has a little bit of room left in her schedule. If you would like to book a workshop, private party, or coaching session in that time, give her a shout! Her dates in California are early to mid-November and she will be visiting the Bay Area, Los Angeles, and everywhere nearby and in-between.

– Yes, AJ did get the donuts she asked for. She put it out into the universe and it came to her (and by that I mean her intern dutifully got them for her).

I don’t know about you, but I am SO stoked for what the future has to hold! Stay tuned to the blog for detailed accounts of Amory Jane’s final few days of her recent teaching tour, St. Edna’s prognosis, and tales from kink camp!

 

XOXO, Intern Courtney14494859_10154008707867945_6156387850907967616_n

Adventure, divorce, Free Write, Life Changes, moving on, Personal Blog, Relationships, Roadtrip, RV Lifestyle, self-discovery, self-love, Separation, Sex Ed Mobile, Sex on the Road, Teaching Tour, Travel, Travel Blog, Uncategorized

Free Write from Love’s Travel Stop

Wet with sweat. Love’s Travel Stop says it’s 101 degrees in Lost Hills, California.

I’ve been through the desert, the dunes, up and down mountains. Cascades, Rockies, Sierra Nevadas.

I expected the ocean to bring relief. I had been dreaming of its salty cool breeze between my thighs.

Instead I found sand. Tiny pieces of glass and shell whipped against my body again and again.

No aftercare provided. Thighs hot and raw and scratched.

And still, four more hours of driving.

“Time After Time” by Cyndi Lauper came on the radio and my heart became a crater.

I felt the dread of sinking but I managed to balance on the rim.

Today marks the first time this year I have heard that song and did not cry.

I listened to the end, windows unrolled, heat on every inch of my skin.

One hour down, three to go, temperatures slowly dropping with the pink setting sun.  

My crater heart fills with water, my source of life. My source of near death.

I hold still. No crashing waves. I breathe.

I push the accelerator.

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