Browse Tag by polyamory
Adventure, BDSM, Culture, Dating, feminist, Feminist Porn, Femmes, Fisting, guest blog, Intern, Intern Courtney, Kink, Mental Health, Personal Blog, Podcast, Polyamory, pop culture, Porn, queer femmes, Queer Porn, Queer Sex, queer sex, real life poly, Relationships, self-discovery, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Toys, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Spanking, Storytelling, Strap on Sex

Want more Femme Sex Party?

Community, Care, and a Femme Sex Coven

Read this heartwarming, sexy, sweet little personal essay written by our very own magical intern (Intern Courtney) for Autostraddle! It’s about her experiences with our Femme Sex Coven (also featured in Episode 9 of our podcast, Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane)!

This made me cry happy tears. So much love for my intern and friend, Courtney, for my community, and for all of the witchy wonderful femmes out there! <3

 

anal sex, Culture, Dating, DIY, feminist, Feminist Porn, Kink, Life Changes, Podcast, Polyamory, Porn, Queer Porn, Queer Sex, queer sex, real life poly, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Toys, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Strap on Sex, Trans porn, trans sex, transgender, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 11: Trans Sex & Sexuality

Episode 11: Trans Sex and Sexuality features a very educational interview with Brettley Mason about sex toys, being non-binary, navigating dysphoria, and safer sex for trans folks. Our 11th episode also includes a lively and personal conversation with Aurora and Intern Courtney about porn, sex work, butts, and being pro-slut.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Magic Wand

Binders from gc2b

Gender Expression items from She Bop

Two-Spirit

Buck-off Stroker

Queer and Trans Porn

Queer Porn TV

Crash Pad Series

She Bop’s upcoming classes

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! Promo code: SOTB4

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Intern/Co-Host – Courtney Kist

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests –Aurora and Brettley

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!

Cougars, Culture, Dating, feminist, Intergenerational Relationships, Intersectional Polyamory, Life Changes, Podcast, Polyamory, pop culture, Porn, real life poly, Relationships, self-love, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Stigma, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 10: Intergenerational Relationships & Cougars

Episode 10: Intergenerational Relationships (& “Cougars”) Our tenth episode is on the topic of intergenerational romantic relationships – or significant age differences between partners – and the unique considerations, benefits, and issues that tend to come up in these relationships. We’ll hear from The Date Maven, Suzanna Mathews, author of Revising Mrs. Robinson – a book that dives into ageism, sexism, and the “cougar taboo.” We’ll also hear from sex and disability educator and advocate Robin Wilson-Beattie about the intersections of age, race, and disability when dating polyamorously.

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Revising Mrs. Robinson

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! Promo code: SOTB4

She Bop’s upcoming classes

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests – Suzanna Mathews and Robin Wilson-Beattie

 

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!

BDSM, feminist, Feminist Porn, Fisting, Kink, Personal Blog, Podcast, Polyamory, Porn, Queer Porn, Queer Sex, self-discovery, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Positive Variety Show, Sex Toys, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Spanking, Uncategorized, Whoopee

Sex on the Brain Episode 9: Live from the Femme Sex Party!

Episode 9: Live from the Femme Sex Party! Okay, I admit that live is a tad misleading. While Intern Courtney and I did throw a femme sex party and recorded it, we decided against broadcasting live. It was a very intimate night and we wanted to allow that to unfold naturally, without having to feel anxious about having a live audience. But don’t worry my precious listeners, we share plenty of real intimacy, sexy noises, and unedited audio straight from the party.

SPOILER ALERT: This episode ends with me having an orgasm. NSFW.

Features Epiphora, Stella HarrisCalico, and other sexy femmes!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Whoopee! A Sex-Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here!

Credits

Host — Amory Jane

Intern/Co-Host — Courtney Kist

Featuring — Epiphora, Stella HarrisCalico, and more!

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song — Mat Vuksinich

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube

Culture, divorce, feminist, Intersectional Polyamory, Kink, Life Changes, Podcast, Poly heartbreak, Polyamory, pop culture, real life poly, Relationships, self-discovery, Separation, Sex, Sex Education, Sex on the Brain, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality, Uncategorized

Sex on the Brain Episode 6: Polyamory

Our sixth episode is on the topic of polyamory – the practice of having more than one romantic relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. This episode features candid and personal conversations between Amory Jane and her guests (Kevin Patterson of Poly Role Models and educator Annamarie Stockwell), from one polyamorous person to another. They talk about the real pros and cons of ethical non-monogamy, the heartbreaks, and how others have reacted to their non-traditional relationship styles. They also talk about intersectionality in polyamory (and about how intersectional feminism is often lacking in the media and polyamory communities in general).

Available below or on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!

Things mentioned in this episode:

Poly Role Models

Compersion: Season 1

More Than Two

Whoopee! A Sex Positive Variety Show – Get tickets here! – Promo Code: SEXBRAIN

Amory Jane’s upcoming classes

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich

Guests – Kevin Patterson and Annamarie Stockwell

 

As always, a huge thanks to our sponsors- She Bop and Uberlube

BDSM, Comedy, Culture, feminist, Kink, Music, Podcast, pop culture, Relationships, Sex, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Sex on the Brain, Sex Workshops, Sex-Positive Entertainment, sexuality

Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane

I’ve been talking about it for a while, but today it is a reality – I have a podcast!  It’s called Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane.

Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane is a geeky, feminist take on sex, kink, and culture. This new sex-positive podcast will be released every other Thursday and will cover a variety of topics, such as porn, non-monogamy, BDSM, gender, and sex in pop culture.

Our first episode is all about sex-positive entertainment and features comedian Bri Pruett, hip hop group Bomb Ass Pussy, Intern Courtney, Sound Engineer Mat, and of course me, your host, Amory Jane. 

Check it out here or find it on iTunes and Stitcher!

Credits

Host – Amory Jane

Sound Engineering and Editing – Mat Vuksinich

Intern – Courtney Kist

Guests – Bri Pruett, Kitty Morena, Jeau Breedlove, and Chris (aka Teddy Bare)

Theme Song by Mat Vuksinich

Music by Bomb Ass Pussy

Additional music by Bensound (http://www.bensound.com)

A big thank you to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!

bap btcf2016_bripruett_lowres

Adventure, divorce, Free Write, Life Changes, moving on, Personal Blog, Relationships, Roadtrip, RV Lifestyle, self-discovery, self-love, Separation, Sex Ed Mobile, Sex on the Road, Teaching Tour, Travel, Travel Blog, Uncategorized

Free Write from Love’s Travel Stop

Wet with sweat. Love’s Travel Stop says it’s 101 degrees in Lost Hills, California.

I’ve been through the desert, the dunes, up and down mountains. Cascades, Rockies, Sierra Nevadas.

I expected the ocean to bring relief. I had been dreaming of its salty cool breeze between my thighs.

Instead I found sand. Tiny pieces of glass and shell whipped against my body again and again.

No aftercare provided. Thighs hot and raw and scratched.

And still, four more hours of driving.

“Time After Time” by Cyndi Lauper came on the radio and my heart became a crater.

I felt the dread of sinking but I managed to balance on the rim.

Today marks the first time this year I have heard that song and did not cry.

I listened to the end, windows unrolled, heat on every inch of my skin.

One hour down, three to go, temperatures slowly dropping with the pink setting sun.  

My crater heart fills with water, my source of life. My source of near death.

I hold still. No crashing waves. I breathe.

I push the accelerator.

2016-09-20-11-52-25-909

Adventure, divorce, Life Changes, moving on, Separation, Sex Education, Travel, Uncategorized

Gratitude & Freedom

Last Thursday, I had an 11 hour day of work + class, but my workshop on threesomes, swinging, and orgies was super fun! I’ll definitely want to take that one on the road. 

Ooooh. Maybe I could get paid to host sex parties/play parties for beginners a day7-smiling-face-with-heart-shaped-eyes or two after the workshops I teach. I could do this all around the country, and even interview folks about their experiences with my workshops and parties. A girl can dream, right?

I having been hanging out in Edna the Sex Ed Mobile and parked in my best friend’s driveway. My mini fridge isn’t working properly in here so I’m refrigerating some things in my friend’s house. I had gone straight for some hummus and crackers when I got home from work, but once I was finished eating, I needed to go put the hummus back in her fridge. The lights were off in the house though, so I wanted to make sure she didn’t think I was a burglar. I sent her a text to see if she was awake.

I realized while typing my texts, that since I stay in her driveway in the front yard and her bedroom is on the same side of the house, we were realistically only a few feet away from each other. It made me feel like a child again, like I was on a walkie-talkie with one of my siblings while we’re camping. Or I felt like we were two best friend neighbors, like all of the ones from my favorite 90’s sitcoms, and there was just a Trådtelefon-illustrationhomemade tin can telephone between us.

I told her this via text. She responded with one my favorite texts I’ve received to date:

“Haha. Best friend one to best friend two. Over aaaaannd out!”

I just love it when my friends get my weird brain and send me something funny in return/play along.

Speaking of, I am feeling extra grateful for friends lately. I have been able to have Edna stationed here most of this month because of my friend’s generosity, and I have been able to prevent my depression from taking over during a very difficult transition and instead emotionally thrive witfennec-1020950_960_720h support from amazing human beings.

The progress I have been making on everything has been slow though, or at least it is feeling too slow for me. However, when I am gentle with myself, I realize that I am making progress in multiple giant areas of my life all at once (starting a business/transitioning into a different kind of career, working through years of grief and trauma, going through a separation, redefining relationships, etc.). So, of course things are going to take time and I am not going to instantly have everything perfectly together and running smoothly.

Considering I have only been out of my house for a month, I am actually pretty proud of what I have accomplished. Edna feels like home already, I am making a lot of new friends and strengthening many of my existing relationships, I co-founded a femme social and sex education meet up group, my husband and I are talking through text and getting along as family even if we aren’t partners, I’ve taught workshops, walked in the Pride Parade, continued doing my regular job, and I am feeding myself (even if it isn’t the healthiest I’ve ever been in my life). I also had a birthday, went on a camping trip, and set up a big interview for a new podcast that will begin recording at the end of this summer.

I list those accomplishments not to brag or to fish for praise, but because it is important for me to continue working on lifting myself up and staying on track. My life goal once was to have a polyamorous family with multiple partners, be a mother, have lots of dogs, live in the country in a spacious Victorian home or farmhouse, and have a successful career as an educator and event planner. I am nowhere close to being on track for that anymore, and I know that some parts of that dream will never be able to happen. Yet, I am hopeful. Not hopeful for those dreams to come true anymore, but hopeful that I will heal and love and find my way and feel free.

Adventure, divorce, Life Changes, moving on, Personal Blog, Relationships, self-discovery, self-love, Separation, Sex Education, Travel, Uncategorized

First Fig

fig

On Sunday, I finished moving out of the house I had lived in with my husband for six years. When I showed up to get the rest of my stuff, the entire house had been rearranged. The dining room and living room furniture had been switched, my art didn’t decorate the walls, and there is now a guitar stand in the bedroom where my dresser used to be. My bed is still there because it won’t fit in my RV, but it is no longer my happy place, my sanctuary, where I am able to go for comfort. My bed- our bed -is his bed now, and it will be the bed he shares with others.

Truthfully, the house looks better than it ever has. The design is simpler, it is less crowded, less youthful, and there aren’t bottles of nail polish all over the bathroom counter and bedroom night stands. The air feels different there, and I am genuinely happy that my husband gets to have a fresh start even though he is staying in the house we had made a home together. I was worried it would be hard for him to move on when he was surrounded by so many memories, but this transition already seems like a good step forward for him. For both of us. We are finding ourselves – the selves we were before we started trying to change to accommodate each other – and we’re hopefully creating better versions of ourselves.

My new life has arrived, and while it feels somewhat familiar because I am still the main character, everything else is rapidly changing. Each day since I have been out of the house has felt like I’m writing my coming of age story, except this story isn’t about leaving youth and becoming an adult. In fact, I feel more in touch now with my younger self than I have in years. I am healing old wounds, nurturing my inner child, and becoming an adult who embraces my nature, my flaws, and my power.

Any of the ways I had tried to tone myself down – to be more likable, more passive, to be less saucy, less scrappy, or be less emotional – are now all coming back to me. Basically, I tried to be less like a rebellious teenager and less difficult to love. I knew my personality was sometimes “too big” to be liked or understood by everyone, but I thought I could tweak it enough to be a cherished wife, lover, and friend. I knew I didn’t want the classic American Dream, but I thought I could potentially have a modified version of it. Even though I tried again and again, I just never fit into being a middle class 9-5 worker. I never fit into traditional monogamy. I was too queer for the straights and too in love with men to be considered “really queer.” And after three years of infertility,  I realized that even motherhood was not an option for me like it was for so many other folks.

I’m understanding now that I’m destined for something weirder. A different kind of life and adventure. I am meant to lovingly embrace the parts of myself that I tried to change for others. I am trying to see those parts of myself as unique gifts to offer something new to the world, or at least to those who want what I have to offer.

Honestly, I don’t know if I really believe in destiny, or in the Universe or God having a plan for each of us. I don’t necessarily think everything happens for a reason, because sometimes life/the world is full of random chaos, strange coincidences, and people actively and often willfully sabotaging themselves and others. However, believing that I’m starting an epic tale, or at least a somewhat exciting journey that will be good for me and the world around me, helps me feel better about all of the changes.

Adventure, DIY, Life Changes, Relationships, Separation, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Travel, Uncategorized

Chapter 1

I just created this brand new website for my present and future adventures in sex education! I really want to have a bunch of uplifting things to say to get everyone pumped about my new projects, but first I want to give you an authentic introduction.

After crowdfunding a three week sex education tour that took me to the South and Midwest earlier this year, I was even more certain that I wanted to be a sex educator who regularly travels and teaches and meets all sorts of other sex-positive people. I wanted to be a national educator, author, and entertainer. It was time for me to spread my legs, er wings, and fly! I was excited to hatch a plan, start a sex podcast, and slowly transition from being a local “sexpert” and sex boutique manager to a national (and perhaps international) sex ed sensation. I had been patiently training for this for years, learning everything I could, making connections in the community, staying up on the new sex toys and sex research. I had a big lovely dream of doing more education tours, traveling and co-teaching with my partners, finding an ideal polyamorous family situation, meeting other sex geeks and educators, and excitedly documenting all of it.

Unfortunately, soon after getting back from my teaching tour, my partner of ten years asked for a separation. I was (and still am) devastated and I thought this meant the end of a lot of my dreams. How could I survive on one income with rapidly rising housing costs, especially if I was planning on just working part time while trying to take my sex education career to even greater heights? How could I create a family now? How would I find enough strength to get through so many things at once, especially while I felt so unloveable? After love__out_of_reach_by_bakkus-d1cupuuthree years of dealing with infertility and loss and putting tons of hard work into my relationships, I thought I had finally found a good balance: supportive partners I loved, comfort, security, and things (sex education and traveling) that made me feel excited and hopeful about a new kind of future. Then, suddenly, it felt like it was all out of reach.

Thank goodness for my community. My friends, boyfriend, other sex educators, and other dreamers reminded me that there is no reason I can’t still have my dreams of being a full-time traveling sex mobile.

Hmmm. Traveling sex mobile, you say? That’s a thing. It can be a thing, right? #sexmobile can be my hashtag. Rising housing costs but I need to move out. #portlandhousingcrisis Now THAT is definitely a real thing. This is a major life transition…which might be exactly the right time to throw in another major life transition. Why the hell not? I am already thinking of how to use this time to transform myself and grow , why not also try to advance my career, see the world, fall even more in love, and help be a part of the sexual revolution? There is less to lose when things already feel lost, right?

I knew what I had to do. It was time for me to pull a poor person’s version of Eat, Pray, Love; It was time for me to follow in Cheryl Strayed’s footsteps, but not literally because I don’t want to hike over 1000 miles. 😉

eat-pray-love_76858

I got a small loan from the bank just under my name, bought a 1987 Toyota Toyhome Camper on Craigslist, and I decided to create a tiny house on wheels that would also be my sex education mobile. St. Edna the Sex Mobile, to be exact.

Totally reasonable plan.

This is going to be some kind of journey. I hope you come along and follow the ride.

xoxo,

Amory Jane